Of all the times I have tripped on cannabis alone, there was one time, which had me wondering. Bare in mind when reading this, I do suffer from an incredibly acute case of the disposition that goes by the name of ‘psychosis’.
The particular strain of cannabis I used was Amnesia Haze. My mood at the time was one of them ‘philosophical rant’ moods. Without seeming too boastful, I have never seen or heard of anyone being affected by cannabis quite in the same way I have. I remember witnessing a strange occurrence involving a confusing trick of the eye, which I think was only caused by the cannabis consumption. It was not as vivid as some of my hallucinations have been in the past when my cannabinoid receptors have gone wild, but it was still real enough for me to class as ‘not just my imagination’ and instead ‘a shock to the chemicals in my brain’. There was a large hill in the distance which I had no idea was there to begin with. I headed towards it but it kept on getting further and further away. This I found rather frustrating, as not only was I very high, I was also trying to chase an imaginary large area of raised ground, as though it had a life of its own. Eventually the large hill in the distance vanished, and I found myself dazed and confused with what had just happened.
I was walking home from a good friends humble abode when this face off with a hill took place. I can remember tons of useless information being processed through my subconscious brain. An example of the thoughts that were firing off in my mind and bouncing from wall to wall in my skull can be used as a comparison to waking up in the morning, half conscious, and sleep talking. The words that dribble out from the sleep talker’s mouth are similar to the thoughts I was having when my drug-induced state was taking place. The words are all nonsense, far from true to any reality I know of.
I made headway down the street and was eventually home. I just so happened to get my hands on a computer and keyboard and began typing away. The things I wrote were in fact rather disturbing, considering I could not remember writing it the next day, until I thought very hard back to the previous night. I could only reminisce little details of what happened, such as opening up a word document, but had no recollection of what I actually typed. The word document I found read this:
“All that is all. In my quest for knowledge I see all. Including the realms OF that infinite darkness that the answer mentioned. Every intention is possible and now I must recall. All is all. She didn’t want you, from what you the pictures inside your head believed. Who knows. Remember this and keep it. For this is a message from the gods. Beware, his wrath will rise again. What did you tell them. Them being your friends. 333 that is the nature of man. 333, 333 wanting to be sick but vomiting rainbows onto the pavement. Is it backwards or forward that you have to remember. Maybe the temptation to shut off and lead away from the path, the answer, the light. Memories coming back to me. The realm of the real, exists only due to our expectations.”
As I had no recollection of writing this, and had been tripping pretty hard on merely a bit of cannabis, I thought this memento of a deep subconscious journey was worth keeping.